Last night when I kissed him on the top bunk my five-year-old said to me, ‘I love you with my whole heart. And I think about you in my whole head.’ He hugs tight and he prays LOUDLY and he cries hard and his whole body laughs. He’s the living poetry of love that is heart-soul-mind-strength even though you could argue that he has a couple reasons to be bitter. His is a life of glass-half-full courage. He sees less than most, but he sees the beauty and the hope.

This week’s 39 things:

 

937 A public holiday

938 Sunny patches of carpet

939 My folks were fun

940 Early morning time alone with Scott – telling me long impassioned stories

941 Moreletakloof Nature Reserve: Friday afternoon chilling with Gwen, three boys, NikNaks and zebras

942 Chinese clothing shops – badly grammar, nice plice

943 Stopayne

944 Scott bonding with Aunty Sam Crewe-Brown at Sunday School

945 Late night neighbourhood laughter and music – happy people

946 A little girl’s long auburn plait

947 Long chats over coffee at church

948 Scott responding to discipline – soft remorse

949 Peter and Terry who are going to be grandparents

950 Wind through pine trees

951 David Attenborough narrating the glory of God on Planet Earth

952 Shopping for house things with Kim

953 Murray’s loud tartan pajama trousers

954 ‘…But as a result, we stopped relying on ourselves and learned to rely only on God…’ (2 Corinthians 1:9)

955 The boys’ 15-year-old cousin crouching in a Wendy house while Scott ‘makes him food’

956 Unexpected kind reassurance

957 Cam doing the Father’s Day ‘haka’ with a bunch of other kids in front of the whole church

958 Father’s Day picnic and boulder clambering at Hedianga

959 When you’re free to pour yourself more coffee in a friend’s kitchen

960 When the boys don’t know we’re listening to their earnest excited schemes to catch the baddies

961 Scott: ‘Mom, let’s play Hey!-Hey!’ (again, to catch the baddies)

962 Fathers who take fathering seriously and lead others

963 Murray making Cam another longed-for wood-tinfoil-duct-tape pirate sword

964 A TED talk about jobs that don’t exist yet

965 Mentally rearranging furniture (so many options)

966 Cam coming with me to the shops wearing flippers and a swimming float

967 Calamari and chips

968 When a quote comes back less than expected

969 Sleeping ‘til it’s light

970 Scott cocking his head – hands upturned – explaining to me carefully –

971 And finishing with, ‘Understand, Mom?’

972 Uninterrupted hours to write

973 Extra hugs when they should be asleep

974 Gas heaters

975 Grace when a day unravels imperfect